Naomi found herself walking around town doing nothing great at all. She was bored and after all that happened with the school being attacked she had no clue what to do anymore but ever since it happened she had felt stronger some how. And weirdest of all she thought she could see ghosts........ man she must have been going crazy. So she took a walk around town and ended up in the park where she sat down under a tree and looked around at the scene. People walking kids playing birds flying around it was nice but for some reason she still didn't feel better about everything and that's when it hit her. Yuki of all people would be the most freaked out some weird person thing came out of nowhere made out with her called everyone a human then left just as quick as he came. So Naomi got up off the ground and headed off towards Yuki's house
Sench
The day at the school was, stressful, for a lack of a better term. Everything was extremely confusing: the weird shining bows of her two classmates, the strange people in black kimonos, the black giant with some weird massive bracers on his arms, the strange angelic woman and, most of all, the twice as strange guy who kissed her when she couldn't move. Most of that time, she was secretly hoping that she was just hallucinating, but even if that was the case, she could no longer tell which of her "hallucinations" were what by the time things really kicked off. Apparently, most of those strange people who were fighting the monsters were students from her school, and one of them got killed by the woman with the flaming sword, but what was that all about? She never even suspected something like that could be real, but after getting home, there was no denying that the things she wanted to believe some kind of a weird dream really did happen. Furthermore, for some reason, she felt completely drained of strength, barely managing to walk to her house and instantly collapsing on the bed once she got there. Without even realizing it, she drifted off into a deep slumber.
She opened her eyes because something was tickling her nose, disrupting her sleep. However, while the first feeling she got was enormous confusion, the second one, following swiftly, was a scare, accompanied by a high-pitched shriek. Yuki was lying on a thin layer of ice in the middle of a pond, and a massive blue bird was standing over her, its right wing apparently being the cause of the tickling sensation on her face. Finally awake, - she heard a soft male voice and looked around, but there wasn't anyone for as far as she could see. What on Earth..? Where am I? What's this bird? - she asked and squealed as the said bird angrily flapped its wings at her. No bird. Articuno, - came the same voice, with somewhat angered intonations, - You awake now. In secret world. I your guardian spirit. The girl got up from the ice and began to look around, finding a desolate snowy wasteland all around. As she was looking around, her sight fell upon herself and she realized she was just in her undies and a light yukata that she usually wore at home, and she felt the unbearable cold of this place... but it didn't affect her. She could feel the temperature was way below anything she ever experienced, and likely below the level at which a human being could survive, but she wasn't cold.
Guardian Spirit? What? Where are you?! What is this place?!Here, - notes of annoyance became clear in the voice, - I Articuno. No bird, guardian spirit.Wait... you're the one talking? - she asked in a dumbfounded voice, turning towards the massive blue bird and taking a better look at it. It was strange, with a general physique of an eagle, but with unnatural colors, incredible tail and some feathers that gave the impression of hair, but most of all, its read eyes, while clearly those of a bird biologically, held the mind that was at least on par with human. I said, no bird, - he announced, angrily flapping his wings once again and crying at her. The cry was also somewhat close to an eagle's, but very different at the same time, although being no bird expert, Yuki wouldn't be able to tell how. Suddenly, one of the two massive wings hit her, throwing her back on the ice. I said no bird!! - the Articuno's voice was now full of rage. Aaah! Don't hurt me please! - she screamed, covering her head, - Wait, I only said "bird" once... I'm sorry! - she added, seeing as how the "guardian spirit", as it called itself, rose its wings again. Hear thoughts. Not it. Name Articuno. Gender male. Really guardian spirit. Souls are one.
Getting up to her feet again and building up some courage, Yuki said: I... I'm sorry, you talk... strangely, I don't understand anything. Much to her surprise, the voice sighed instead of yelling at her. I don't like talking human, but since you're completely out of it, it can't be helped. I am Articuno, your guardian spirit, often referred to as Ice Phoenix. The events at the school today had triggered your awakening as a Hogosha... a special kind of human. This place is in your mind, a secret place where we can meet. As a guardian spirit of yours, my soul is tied to yours closely. Taking a few seconds to shake off her surprise, the girl once again spoke up, this time with a bit more confidence. School... wait, you know what happened at that time?! Can you explain it to me?! Although she didn't notice it instantly, Yuki suddenly realized she was feeling really cold. No, it wasn't just cold: she could practically feel her skin turning into ice, followed by her insides. She wanted to say something, but her lips got frozen together. As if noticing the state she was in, the Articuno flapped its wings several times, creating a strong gust of wind that picked her up and threw her in the air. Eh?! - was all she managed to think, suddenly finding herself no longer standing on the ground, but falling towards it. However, before she could reach it, the massive blue body of her guardian spirit got in the way. Her eyes widened as she managed to focus her sight despite the sudden movement and freezing cold: she was falling in Articuno's open huge beak. Yuki didn't even manage to let out a scream as she was swallowed whole by the bird.
Eeeeeeee!! - she shrieked, sitting up on her bed. Oh, thank god. What a weird and disgusting dream, - she said out loud, although there wasn't anyone who she could be talking to in the house. The dream, no, nightmare didn't make any sense, but the sensation of being eaten by a bird, if what she felt was realistic, was really horrible. If I meet an unfortunate end, I definitely want it to be anything but being eaten, - she joked, although her body was actually covered in cold sweat and shaking. The bad dream left her almost more tired than she was before, despite the fact she slept for over two hours, judging by the clock. I wasn't even going to fall asleep, but- eeep! - she let out another scream, severely shorter and closer to her normal voice's normal pitch than the previous one, when she stumbled onto something on her bed. Turning around sharply, he found several pieces of ice. They were apparently lying around her when she fell asleep, and rolled down to where she was previously when she sat up, so as she leaned back, her back ended up on top of them. What... is ice... doing on my bed? I surely didn't bring any with me when I lied down, - she asked herself, but found no answer. Still, before it would begin to melt and turn her bed into a real mess, she removed it and dropped it in the sink. Although it was hardly possible in her mind, the day had only gotten weirded after she came home, and more so still after she woke up. Trying to brush off unwanted thoughts, she remembered that she hadn't eaten yet, and just as the dinner was about ready, her doorbell rang. Senpai, - Yuki said in surprise upon opening the door, - Um, what's up?
Hideki Takahashi
"Huh what's up, oh last time i check the Sky is up........ wait! i see a bird look!" Naomi said sarcastically as she looked at Yuki and sighed. "I came to see if you were alright, Last time i check you were being kissed by a weirdo and carried off by a group of boys" She said with another sigh as she turned around looking up at the now setting sun. "Anyway you got a minute?" She asked in a tired tone. After that day she really wanted to go home and sleep until the school was rebuilt and she had to go back but at that time checking up on her friend was alot more important. There were dark rings around her eyes to show how tired she was. she then looked up to see the huge black rift in the Sky. "Hey Yuki do you see that?" she asked pointing to the giant rift she had just noticed. Maybe it was some weird storm cloud?
Sench
You don't have to be a jerk, you know, - she replied tiredly: after the events of the day, that strange nightmare and the weird things that seemed to be continuing after she woke up, Yuki didn't have the strength to deal with her friend's attitude. I'm not sure if I'm alright. But in any case, come on in, - she said, taking a step inside the house and opening the door widely for Naomi, not that she would really have trouble entering with the door open averagely wide as it was before, - Are you hungry? Dinner is just about ready. She looked outside for a few moments when the other girl pointed at the sky, and saw some weird thing in the sky, but in all honesty, she was too tired to be surprised or worried anymore. Yes, I see it. I don't know what that is though, or if you're even talking about what I think you're talking about. After today, I think I might be crazy. She waited for Naomi to enter the house and locked the door behind her. Without saying anything else, Yuki headed to the kitchen, where a simple dinner was being made, nodding for her friend to make herself comfortable in the living room. Her house was a small two-story cottage, yet for living alone, that was quite a lot of room. In a few minutes, she emerged from the kitchen with a couple of plates and a dish of pilaf. Help yourself, - she said shortly, serving the table and sitting down at it. Her house was furnished and held in a European style, which was a relatively rare thing to see in Japan, but likely more comfortable, convenient and less lonely. Not knowing whether Naomi preferred chopsticks or a fork, she brought her both. Remaining just as silent, she began to eat. This behavior, gloomy and silent, was something completely out of character for her, but she wasn't one to start talking about her problems to other people. Yet, she hoped that her friend would catch on to it and ask her what was wrong, because she felt the need to let those things out.
Hideki Takahashi
Naomi sat down and got comfortable as she slowly began to eat the pilaf with the pair of chop sticks. After awhile she noticed how Yuki was acting and decided to ask why "I think I'm going crazy too anyway what's wrong with you? you don't seem to be yourself" She asked taking another mouth full of Pilaf. She couldn't help but think what is Yuki was going through the same things as she was? what if she was seeing things? Naomi soon brushed the thought aside as he turned to Yuki to take in whatever she was going to say. After all what were friends for?
Sench
OOC: that's a really half-assed post -_-
What's wrong? A lot of things, - Yuki said, lazily beginning to poke the food in her plate with a fork, - When at first the thing at school began today, I thought I was dreaming or maybe hallucinating, but that isn't the case, is it? The building was really damaged, and a girl from our school really got killed by some weird glowing woman, not that anyone would believe it anyway. Didn't you see them? The monsters that attacked the school, those strange people who came out of nowhere to fight them... everyone I asked so far said they didn't see any monsters, only some people doing weird stuff with fireworks or something. But that wasn't fireworks! She dropped the fork on the table as she exclaimed that and buried her face in her hands. Am I just going crazy then, to have seen something nobody else did? I feel drained, both physically and emotionally, I got home and fell asleep, but that didn't help at all. All of those things and most of those people, they weren't really human. Just like that guy... - she looked up at Naomi and seemed to blush, - That weird person who kissed me... I was scared, confused and, for some reason, unable to move. I certainly didn't want to give my first kiss to a complete stranger, but... when he touched me, it was unpleasant and for some reason painful, yet I was also shaking all over... with excitement. As she said that, she moved the plate away a bit and planted her face on the table, covering her hand with her hands. I don't know what is wrong with me, - she added.
Sench
OOC: Dude, what the **** ever! It's been over two days, you were online more than enough time to post, I PM'd you to post, your posts are half-assed at best
[Left]
Kinzo
Hideki: 17 SE
Spoiler:
Base:
22.9>23
Increase:
None
Decrease:
x0.8 Excessive lack of punctuation and run-on sentences.
x0.9 RP quality was lackluster. I excluded the fact that your responses did not match the level of action Sench made in each post, and am solely focusing on the fact that your posts failed to actually portray the image you described. Rather than saying "She was worried." Try to give signs that show how she was worried. " Her teeth pressed lightly against the top of her bottom lip as she quivered slightly with worry." A good rule of thumb is the describe the scene exactly how you see it in your head, sparing little to no detail.
Bonus:
None
Sench:153 SE ☑
Spoiler:
Base:
107
Increase:
x1.1 Grammar - While your sentences are formed well, there are a few mistakes, yet they are all of the same things. Simply, you don't use quotation marks for dialogue, and you do not capitolize all of the Pronouns you use. Aside from that, it was fine. I know you color-code the dialogue, which is fine, however using dashes in place of quotation marks are a tad bit awkward, and really it takes the same effort to just use quotation marks.
x 1.3 RP quality- In this case the RP itself was not absolutely the best I've seen, however it was very detailed, and I feel you deserve a little extra for producing so much out of so little response from Hideki. * Glares at Hideki*
Decrease:
None
Bonus:
none
Sench
-_-
Books don't use quotation marks for dialogue, but separate it from narrative text with dashes. They start every new dialogue piece with a new line and a dash as well, but since I can use colors and bolding to separate speech from narrative text, I don't have to use excessive line-breakers
And last I checked, only "I" is capitalized in the middle of the sentence
